‘Carry Your Cross’ and Be You!

During a Mass reflection from September 14, 2021, a junior student preacher revealed her identity struggle to “fit in” as a first-year Fenwick student.

By Julia Overmyer ’23 (River Forest, IL)

Good morning! Today, we celebrate the Exaltation of the Holy Cross. As I was preparing my reflection for today’s Mass, I was gifted with the truly wonderful experience of writer’s block. No matter what I wrote, I felt like I wasn’t grasping the true meaning of what we celebrate today.

Student Preacher Julia Overmyer is a junior at Fenwick from River Forest, IL.

In the second reading, Paul writes about Jesus, “Rather, He emptied Himself, taking the form of a slave, coming in human likeness; and found human appearance, He humbled Himself, becoming obedient to death, even death on a cross. Because of this, God greatly exalted Him.”

Those few lines, those few powerful lines, finally gave me what I was searching for: humility.

We celebrate today to honor the Cross. The Cross that Jesus was crucified on; the Cross that Jesus defeated death on; and the Cross that represents our Christian faith as a whole.

There is a well-known expression that you have or will learn in your theology class. This expression is “Carry your Cross.” For those who haven’t heard this expression, it means to accept the challenges put in front of you, fully placing your trust in God. Freshman year was a time when I struggled to carry my own cross. I was attempting to solve things on my own rather than in partnership with God.

Like some of you, I came from a school where only a few kids came here to Fenwick. At first, I saw this as an opportunity to branch out and make more friends. I figured that there would be plenty of other kids in the same boat as me. Although there were others whose situations mirrored my own, I slowly started to see a pattern: A lot of people had arrived at Fenwick with groups of friends formed from their previous schools.

I desired to fit it — I tried changing my looks, hobbies and, basically, who I was. And let me tell you, it did not change anything and just made me feel even worse. Finally, I prayed to God, asking for some sort of guidance to what I was doing wrong or how I could better fit in.

After countless prayers and nights of frustration, I had concluded that I truly was alone. In a time where I was supposed to be meeting those who would become my lifelong friends, I felt like I had nobody. I had lost faith in God and His role in my life. I was so consumed in the idea of changing who I was in order to fit in, that I didn’t see what God had already given me.

He had given me everything that I had needed to succeed, beginning with the humility to recognize that I couldn’t do this on my own, but needed His guidance and assistance. God doesn’t tell us how to live out our lives; that is the beauty of His gift of free will. Instead, he gives us the clarity that we need in a way that we couldn’t have come to on our own. God has created every one of us to be unique, and by trusting the process that God has laid out for us, we can accept who He has made us to be. This realization finally allowed me to pick up the cross that I had set down and put my faith before my actions.

Now, I am very happy to report that I have made friends who have been the best blessing I could’ve ever received, all through trusting God first. They accept me for who I am and what God has created me to be. So, every night, I take a minute to thank God for showing me that I shouldn’t give up just because the answer isn’t in front of me. And to all those who are struggling in this situation, don’t lose faith and use the tools God has given you.

Throughout our journey upon this Earth, we are going to experience some things that we might not understand at first. But as we go through our writer’s blocks of life, we must remember that the answers may not lie in front of us, but they are always within God’s plan. Let us continue to carry our cross and keep faith.

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